Thank you, film majors, for immediately understanding the title.

For the rest of you…

Brought to you by my favorite film about the Zodiac killer starring Kevin Spacey, Se7en.

But anyway, there have been a few blogs revealing what Hopkins students keep in their bags (or backpacks, for you tote haters.)

I decided to take a slightly more organic approach and display to you, dear reader, what has been festering in my bag over the last couple of weeks. I’ve known that I wanted to do this blog for a while now, but I wanted to make sure that the items that I displayed were authentic. So, these are all things that helped me survive during a couple of weeks of midterms. I think from all of the junk that I found at the bottom of my bag it’s pretty clear to see that my bag was 1) my sidekick 2) the bag form of a mobile home 3) a vessel for some bizarre stuff.


I can’t go anywhere without my planner. I swear, it’s the only thing keeping my GPA and sanity in safe territory. I’m not a huge school supplies shopper (except for when Lisa Frank folders were en vogue), but this is one item that always makes my annual shopping list. By the end of the school year, it’s a total mess; the pages are bleeding with colorful ink from too loose water bottles, the pages are wrinkled with love and stress, and hopefully, every checklist item has a nice, solid line through it at the end of each week.

Alpha Phi distributed these nifty pencil cases at the end of last semester, and it’s been a great way to organize my inventory of pens. Most college students bring a pen or pencil, or bum one off of their next door neighbor in class, but I like to have my choice of colors and types. As a film student, many of my classes are hours long seminars, and switching pens keeps my attention and my notes’ organization on track.

This is a reading quiz from my Intro to Business class. We have pop quizzes on our reading assignments, which are usually very interesting economic columns from The New Yorker or some other humanities-friendly publication. I got a 3/3 on this quiz, hooray!

I also don’t go anywhere without my water bottle. My friend Megan and I are half-jokingly obsessed with hydration. I feel so much happier and healthier when I’m steadily drinking water instead of guzzling tea or Naked juice. I had a Dutch field hockey coach who would always say “hydrate or die.” He ain’t wrong.

5 Enter the mess. After a grueling couple of weeks of running around and having meals on the go, I’ve accumulated this ridiculous stack of receipts, featuring Chipotle, CharMar, Levering, and other food places nearby campus. I have a bad habit of stuffing my receipt into my bag, where it disappears into the abyss of the bottom, only to be resurrected when I finally clean out my bag. A particularly hilarious purchase includes $24 worth of Kind bars.

6 I’m obsessed with ChapStick. I kind of hate these Eos (eos? EOS? I’m out of touch, clearly) things, but it was a gift, and it does keep my lips hydrated. Hydrate or die applies to lips, too, I guess?

Just as I have a tendency to shove receipts into my bag, after I’ve chomped down my piece of gum, I jam its wrapped into my bag. Here is a pile of 5 Gum wrappers, with special guest features by York peppermint patty and Tootsie Roll wrappers.

Fruit leather. My one true weakness.

9 A mysterious pink post-it note that says “Gen’s” in my mom’s handwriting??? Origins unknown.

10 Cough drops are students’ lifeblood during flu season. I nabbed these citrus Halls cough drops back in the fall, and they’ve remained in my bag as a quick defense against an oncoming sore throat.

11 5 Gum, the root of my trash hoarding.

12 A handout for the FAS Gloria Steinem speech. My friend Jack is in charge of the design for FAS, and the handouts came out beautifully! I didn’t actually attend her talk (please forgive me, Goddess Gloria), but I heard rave reviews.

13 I gave up coffee back in September because it made me feel utterly horrible. I’ve revived my love for tea, and Earl Grey is, by far, my favorite. This teabag is from Brody Cafe,who has my favorite Earl Grey on campus! It’s dark, tasty, and boasts beautiful packaging.

14 Pizza Studio, Charles Villages’ newest eating establishment, opened last week. During its opening week, there were many, many free pizza opportunities. I arrived at Pizza Studio a few minutes after an event ended, and the manager was kind enough to give me this free pizza coupon! They have adorable little personal pizzas and the workers there are wicked nice. They called my pizza a masterpiece… a masterpiece!

15 As I said, it’s sickness season here at Hopkins, and my boyfriend recently took a trip to the hospital with a nasty case of mono and pneumonia. Yikes. Here is my super trendy Visitors badge, which allowed me to bypass the security guard and keep him company/taunt him with snacks he wasn’t allowed to have.

16 I think my brain is broken because I cannot work in silence. I swear, even the buzzing, loud cafe in Brody is sometimes too quiet for me. My headphones guarantee that I have plenty of noise for my multitasking brain.

17 Laptop charger, duh.

18 Laptop, duh. Note the juxtaposition between the pink sorority sticker and nautical tattoo parlor sticker.

19 Because I’m clearly too lazy to ever remove anything from my bag, I’m currently stowing three–three–pairs of glasses: my prescription ones, which actually allow me to see the board and be a normal student during class; my sunglasses, in a sort of wishful thinking for non-gray winter days; and my prescription sunglasses, because I’m the kind of person who actually owns prescription sunglasses.

20 In a fruitless attempt to arm myself with ibuprofen for late nights at the library, the bottle cracked open and spilled these little guys everywhere. Inedible, yet hilarious. I think they really add something to this portrait of my packrat behavior.

I swear I cleaned out my bag after this photo was taken. I swear that the receipts and the gum wrappers and the yucky Advil are in the garbage. Swear.